The post none of you asked for!

Today is the third day of Nanowrimo (http://nanowrimo.org).  Every year, there is an online challenge to write 50,000 words in the month of November, presumably using the time you'd spend shaving.  I get the itch to write around this time of year, and the fact that it's Nanowrimo time is a bit of motivation for me.  Despite my laziness, I do feel a need to write.  When I arrive to work early, I take the time to send one of my friends a 'just because' email that's filled with wit and humour (they agree with me that it's wit and humour, at any rate. It's more likely to be caffeine filled drivel, similar to the blog.)

I logged in recently, and my profile indicates that I've been a member for six years.  This is an impressive badge to carry, particularly given that I've written exactly zero books, and submitted 0 words to my word count for all years combined.

The webpage is pretty.  It's got the two shades of blue, with the dark brown writing, very stylish.  It has a crest that's cartoonish, but nice and crisp.  That incredibly trendy, kinda hipsterish* look that actually makes me want to gouge my eyes out.  As I said, it's a nice website, and it runs smoothly, which is actually the most important feature.

The top of the page reads "the world needs your novel."  I actually have two issues with this sentence:

1.  Don't blow smoke up my ass.
2.  The world needs a lot of things.  It needs me to pay attention when I'm at work.  It needs me to pay my taxes, and be a good citizen.  What it genuinely doesn't need is another novel.**

The site then boasts 259,261 novelists.  Provided that I'm one of those, I can only assume their definition of 'novelist' is looser than a Florida retirees sexual mores.

It is usually at this point during an angry rant I remind myself that "it takes all kinds."*** If everyone in the world were like me, nothing would get done.****

Herein lies the real truth.  The amount of willpower I have is embarrassingly small. 

Pictured: My willpower.  Enlarged to show texture.

If our attitude towards willpower were the same as our attitudes towards penises, I would have the coolest convertible in my city.  As a small example, I didn't sit down to write this post until after I convinced myself I needed a tomato sandwich, which meant I had to go buy bread and I didn't even stop at the first store, but kept driving because I really liked the song that was on the radio.  I think Nanowrimo interests me, because it feels like maybe there will be an outside force pushing me to write, but where's the pressure?  A bunch of people I don't really know are going to judge me (not even me, because I've used a different screenname.)  Without the consequences, there's just no pressure.

Truth be told, a large part me - including when I'm in a fantastic mood - feels that Nanowrimo is for people who do not have full time jobs and responsibilities outside of those jobs..  If we genuinely think about it, it boils down to about 6-7 pages per day (50,000 words divided by 30 days = 1,666.6666and-so-on, divided by, say 250 words per page = 6.66666and-so-on pages per day).  Actually, it seems reasonable, but when you consider that includes weekends, and someone like me is in front a computer all day at work.  Then we can play with it again, and say "what if you just did it on weekends?" which totals 23.333333and-so-on pages per day on the weekend.

What if I were to cut the goal in half, just to get things off the ground (so, only write 25,000 words)? Well, yes, but then we're back to our previous concerns of consequences.  And I don't make the kind of money this guy does, to pay someone to keep me on point.

I need someone to slap me.



*Every time I use the word Hipster, I have a creeping sense that the damn definition has changed again. "You can't define us, man."  Fuck you.
**Someone should tell Iceland.  In actuality, I love that news story, no matter how crabby I am. 
***This is a whole other phrase I can rant about for hours.  You complain to your friend about the way someone does something, and they shrug and say "it takes all kinds," effectively dismissing your complaint without any analysis of potential issues.  It's a polite "shut up, asshole."
****Also, there would be more car accidents; I'm not the best driver.
 

Dewey Wrap Up

Which hour was most daunting for you?
We went for a walk at around 11pm last night.  The moments leading up that were pretty difficult.  In complete fairness, and in the interest of full-disclosure, we all needed to get a fair bit of sleep last night.  This is Canada's Thanksgiving weekend, and we need to be in different places with family today.

Could you list a few high-interest books that you think could keep a Reader engaged for next year?
I'm really enjoying Stephen King's "On Writing."  It's my second time reading it, and there's something incredibly warm and engaging in his voice.  I would recommend it to anyone interested in writing, regardless of whether they like horror or not. 

Do you have any suggestions for how to improve the Read-a-thon next year?
I feel that having more engagement from the cheerleaders would have been nice.  

What do you think worked really well in this year’s Read-a-thon?
The challenges are nice.  I wish I had the time to do the tea stain doodle challenge (can't remember what it's called).  I enjoyed spending time with my friends.

How many books did you read?
I started and finished The Witches.
I started and am halfway through "Dark Companions" by Ramsey Campbell and "On Writing" by Stephen King.

What were the names of the books you read?
See above.

Which book did you enjoy most?
No preference.

Which did you enjoy least?
No preference, really.  They were all quite different, and they're all from writers I like.  I chose them because they were sure thing.

If you were a Cheerleader, do you have any advice for next year’s Cheerleaders?
Well, I was only hit by one cheerleader during my experience, so I'm not seeing a lot of impact at the moment. Disappointing, to be honest.

How likely are you to participate in the Read-a-thon again? What role would you be likely to take next time?
Pretty likely.  Would probably just be a reader again.  :)

Audiobook Dream Date

From the Geeky Blogger's Book Blog:

Super simple: Pick a book and assign who would be your dream narrator!

There are so many fantastic answers to this...

I would absolutely love to hear Robert Webb read Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-Four.  I love his voice:

Dewey's Readathon Progress

This is my second readathon, although it is my first participating in "the Dewey*"  Given that we're close to Halloween,   I'm focusing on horror or creepy. 

Today,  I'm reading with two of my oldest friends**, and they seem to be making better progress than me.  When I spend time with them and we chat about books, it becomes clear to me that I read the least of the three of us.  This is a little saddening for me, as I used to pride myself on being well read. Each time I spend a good block of time reading, I have the sad realization that I'm not a quick reader.  Truthfully, I'm not incredibly well read, and I'm a slow reader.  I don't know if there's an anonymous group for it - probably in the realm of 'whiny babies anonymous' or 'spoiled brat douchebaggery' - but if I find one, I may attend a meeting or two.  At the very least, I'll find someone who's worse off than I, and nothing warms the soul better than finding someone you can look down upon***.

Moving on, I did manage to finish one book this time around so far (still many hours to go).   This is what I've dipped into so far:

I had started out reading Dark Companions, the short story collection of Ramsey Campbell's.  His stuff is quite chilly, more atmospheric than most modern popular horror (like something's not quite right until the final, horrifying reveal. Not to say it's formulaic in any way, because it's not.)

Stephen King's "On Writing," is a re-read for me.  Like a conversation with an old friend.

And I started and finished "The Witches," by Roald Dahl.  Delightful.  I almost brought "Switch Bitch," a collection of short stories for adults, but I'm glad I went with this one.


At any rate, back to it.





*I apologize if referencing it this way is not proper.  I certainly mean no disrespect in any way.
**Meaning, I've known them the longest.  I'm not here to get myself in trouble.
***For those who haven't met or read me: yes, that was tongue in cheek.

Mini-challenge: hour 2!

From  http://www.rivercityreading.com/2013/10/deweys-mini-challenge-hour-2-book-tunes.html

Choose a song that best suits the book you're reading so far and why:

Currently reading "Dark Companions," a short story collection by Ramsey Campbell.  It's delightfully spooky. 

choose a song that best suits the book you're reading so far and explain why - See more at: http://www.rivercityreading.com/2013/10/deweys-mini-challenge-hour-2-book-tunes.html#sthash.oEXZD4w1.dpuf

choose a song that best suits the book you're reading so far and explain why - See more at: http://www.rivercityreading.com/2013/10/deweys-mini-challenge-hour-2-book-tunes.html#sthash.oEXZD4w1.dpuf

choose a song that best suits the book you're reading so far and explain why - See more at: http://www.rivercityreading.com/2013/10/deweys-mini-challenge-hour-2-book-tunes.html#sthash.oEXZD4w1.dpuf

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJKqUw39GNU

Hello all! Let's get ready to reeeeeead!!!!!!!!!!

Dewey's Readathon - Post 1

1) What fine part of the world are you reading from today?
I'm reading from Guelph Ontario!  My home is located in London, Ontario, but I've come out here to read with my lovely friends, Janey Canuck (janeycanuck.com) and Katy (http://seekatydo101thingsin1001days.blogspot.ca/)

2) Which book in your stack are you most looking forward to?
A collection of short stories by Ramsey Campbell.  Today may end up being entirely horror filled.

3) Which snack are you most looking forward to?
I brewed a bunch of fresh iced tea yesterday for today.


4) Tell us a little something about yourself!
I'm a law clerk, hailing from London, Ontario.  I enjoy movies and music and have an interest in the strange and unusual. And a strange love for English comedians.

5) If you participated in the last read-a-thon, what’s one thing you’ll do different today? If this is your first read-a-thon, what are you most looking forward to?
This is my first Dewey!  I look forward to meeting some cheerleaders and spending time with friends, and reading of course.

Book Snob's High Summer Read-a-Thon Reading Challenge

Saturday morning, my friend Colleen will be on her way to my place for a day of reading.  We each have our piles of books set aside ("Call me when you get here, so I can help you carry your books up," I said), and I have plenty of lamps, pillows, and blankets, in the living room, so we can each build our reading nests.  I'm going to have both the tassimo and the drip coffee maker ready to go, and fresh fruit and bagels for fuel.  I'm setting up the blow up mattress in the library for myself and making up my bed for her, so either of us can take a nap without bothering the other.

The read-a-thon is for the entire week, but both of us have been working the whole week, so we're doing a blitz.  I am quite excited.

For the Reading Challenge, I'm reading Caitlin Moran's "Moranthology".  It's none-fiction, so I'm not certain this will count, but she writes about an interview with Keith Richards, and an entire evening with Lady Gaga.  Well, I found a pic with both of them in it.

Gorgeous Gaga proving vertical stripes do no one any favours.

Incredibly straightforward.  Sorry.  :P