I'm experiencing high amounts of anxiety at the moment. For example, I'm actually dreading going to work today. I'm really losing grip on a lot of things at work, and I'm expecting I'll be the center of a difficult conversation today. The truth is, I'm being crushed under the weight of all the work, and it's causing me to make mistakes. Last week, I worked enough overtime for two full lieu days. We are bringing someone else in to help, which I'm grateful for, but that means that in a month or two, I'll be even further off track, training someone. At the moment, I've got someone who asks to sit with me for a few hours every week, so they can job shadow me. She's sat with me a lot, and I'm getting annoyed. It doesn't feel like she wants to learn the job; she's interested in the job one step above me, and our boss told her she should be taking a look at my position.
My position doesn't get the respect it deserves. Even people currently in my job are simply looking at it to launch themselves into a job higher up. As a result, I'm the only constant in the position, and it needs attention to truly become what we need it to be.
I'm dreading going to work today.
Additionally, I had been chatting with a nice fellow through a dating site. My last message to him was on Saturday morning, and I haven't heard back. We've gone a couple of days between messages, but it's officially three now. Also, he has time off right now and he might have gone home to see his parents. I don't know. I don't think I had a whole lot emotionally invested in him, but he seemed to be the only thing going right, and now he's AWOL. I'm considering a last ditch effort of sending my phone number and telling him he can text if he likes. I was all ready to send out that message yesterday afternoon, and then I just... didn't. Would it look desperate? Part of me thinks it would just make me look interested, which for some reason in my mind is a horrid sin.
As you can read from the above, I've also concluded that I'll never really be ready to date, so I may as well just jump in. Also, I'm tired. Alright, 6am. Time to make coffee.